From the Pastor

I think my aversion to social media is well-documented, particularly when they are used for nothing more edifying than taking gossip to a higher technological level or to spread baseless and factually inaccurate rumors. Nevertheless (and I hate to admit this) occasionally something good makes its way through the mindless morass of digital drivel. Though I am not personally on Facechat or Snapgram or any of those other platforms, people in my life sometimes draw my attention to a posting.

Thus, for the first, and possibly the last, time, I am forwarding to you something that was sent to me. Since the following article appears to have been written with tongue firmly planted in cheek, I am not concerned with whether it is a genuine letter or not, so don’t go looking it up on Snipes or whatever.

FULLERTON, CA — Local father Trevor Michelson, 48, and his wife Kerri, 45, are reeling after discovering that after 12 years of steadily taking their daughter Janie to church every Sunday they didn’t have a more pressing sporting commitment — which was at least once every three months — she no longer demonstrates the strong quarterly commitment to the faith they raised her with, now that she is college-aged.

Trevor Michelson was simply stunned by the revelation. “I just don’t understand it. Almost every single time there was a rained-out game, or a break between school and club team seasons, we had Janie in church. It was at least once a quarter. And aside from the one tournament in 2011, we never missed an Easter. It was obviously a priority in our family — I just don’t get where her spiritual apathy is coming from.”

“I can’t tell you how often we prayed the prayer of Jabez on the way to a game,” added Janie’s mother.

“You know, the more I think about it, the more this illustrates how the church just keeps failing this generation,” lamented Trevor, citing a recently-googled study by Barna or someone.

The Michelsons further noted plans to have a chat with their pastor after their younger son Robert’s soccer season calms down a bit.

Except for suggesting that there are other pursuits that one might substitute for sports that could keep you out of church, ‘nuff said.